MY FATHER AND HIS SLICE OF LIFE
He would sit in the dark with the television on. In his hand was a small glass of water. The expression upon his face was one of having “checked out” as if he had given up on any source of light that may shine through his life.
My father worked long, hard days to take care of his
family. We never got into any deep discussions, we never pitched around a
baseball or threw hoops. We coexisted under the same roof as the days slipped
by.
I find that as we grow older, we rediscover our
parents as people as opposed to mom and dad. Their personalities, their habits,
their unanswered desires; become apparent as do the gentle, delicate pockets of
their souls.
It’s like when you are a kid in elementary school,
and you are out shopping with your mom for groceries and you see your teacher
in the store. At first you are taken aback because you never thought about your
teacher having a family and going to shop for groceries. They were just people
you saw at school. You did not know anything personal about them, and all the
sudden you have this sneak peak into their life.
Well that was what I got from observing my father –
these puzzle pieces of how he chose to live his life; his acceptance that “What
is – is.” or “It is what it is.”
I am sure he wanted more than to spend ten hour days
on his feet in a pressing factory. I am sure he had dreams as we all do, and I
am sure he loved his family.
I wish he would have had a better life and perhaps
the luxury of self-exploration, leading him to a path of something better. He
deserved to have something that would have fulfilled and enriched his life.
Every generation deals with a different set of obstacles.
Every generation gets around those obstacles differently. For me, the obstacles
motivated me to break down the walls, and make sure that no one
ever broke me.
I learned from my father that work is important, but the right work is more important.
If he could reappear in front of me for 3 more
minutes, I would let him know how much I love him and how much I appreciate all
that he sacrificed to put food on the table.
I would share with him the joy of having been able
to support my family, through and through and the beautiful extended family I
treasure so much.
I think he would be proud – his son – with just a
high school education – a kid always in trouble – now an author and a mentor to
troubled teens.
I would profess to him my awareness that life comes
full circle. The beginning is full of open roads to take, the end is literally
the end of one of those roads.
It is the time in-between that matters the most.
I know that it only takes one person in your life to
say, “I’ve got your back” and that makes life all the more manageable.
Truly being there for someone makes all the
difference in the world.
So, remember to be there.
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